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Brett Kavanaugh's Penis

Own Brett Kavanaugh's Penis

Brett Kavanaugh thinks he has the right to control your body.

Now, you can control his.

Brett Kavanaugh thinks he has the right to control women's bodies. Now, you can control his. For the low, low price of literally any donation you feel like giving, YOU can own Brett Kavanaugh's Penis! That's right: we own Brett Kavanaugh’s Penis. And now, so can you.

Buy today, and you will receive an official "Letter of Ownership" proving that you own Brett Kavanaugh's Penis! Show it off to all your friends! Throw darts at it! Feed it to the neighbor's dog! Really, you can do whatever you want to do with it! Just grab a hold, and it's yours.

Oh yeah, and here's the best part: 

All proceeds go to Planned Parenthood.

So come on! What are you waiting for? Own Brett Kavanaugh's Penis today!

 
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(*By "Brett Kavanaugh's Penis," we also mean "dot com." In all references. Obviously. Don't sue, Donald. Or Brett. But mostly Donald.)